What’s Good for the Goose……


I don’t know about you, but I’m living in hell. That’s Homeowner’s Association Hell (HAH), for those of you who care or can empathize.

I’ve lived in the same subdivision close to eleven years now, and I want you to know upfront that I LOVE my house. My house and I have a great relationship, one filled with love, joy, and blood, sweat and tears. But, along with many of you, I’ve weathered many a storm from the onslaught of some nasty neighbors. One of which insisted on making my life a living hell because I had two dogs. By the way, dogs are allowed in HAH. The by-laws state you can have up to two of man’s best friend residing in your home. That didn’t stop my old, crotchety neighbor though. I kept receiving violation notices about burned out grass, evident when spring arrives after a hard winter. I kept replacing the sod and doing my part until one day, I went postal.

There it was. And, it wasn’t a Christmas card either.

A slightly used business card wedged in between my screen door that said, “Service Master Disaster Resoration Services”.  Now, something told me that my crotchety old neighbor planted this business card for my personal viewing pleasure, so I played along and called the name on the card.

“Mr. Smith? Yes, I received your card from a neighbor of mine, John Whatchamacallit, and he said that you did some work on his place not too long ago, is that correct?”

Turns out it WAS correct. When I figured out I was on the right path to righteousness, I decided to write my neighbor a letter.

I included in the letter that harassment is not what I signed up for in this subdivision call HAH, and if he doesn’t like dogs, he should have moved somewhere else. I also informed him that if he harassed me one more time, I would notify the police. I also tore out of the dictionary the page where you can find the word, “neighbor” and highlighted it for him.

I notified my Homeowner’s association of my plight which fell on deaf ears. But, they had no problems issuing me violation after violation since my old crotchety neighbor was on the board.

That was the first encounter with HAH regarding my dogs. My neighbor is dead now, up in heaven with all the other dogs.

Anyway, the second problem with HAH is that they feel that the rules don’t apply to them. One of my neighbors didn’t read the by-laws stipulating the two dog rule, (which is their bad), and they adopted a third dog. Well, imagine what happened about six months later. So, now they have to get rid of their dog. I can agree with the letter of the law, but read on…

One of the board members lives three doors down from me. Guess what I saw them doing the other day? Walking their dogs. All FOUR of them.

Now, my husband said that they are probably dog sitting someone else’s pups. I told him that it’s going on two weeks since we’ve seen them walk these dogs, so I don’t imagine dog sitting is an option, do you?

I’m sick and tired of board members getting up high on their pedestals to claim immunity. Dave said that since this doesn’t affect us directly, we shouldn’t get involved. I actually took pictures of this board member walking their four dogs, but we now fear retribution thru the boards acts of sending violation letters for stupid or non-existent issues or making our lives more difficult than they need to be.

So, on the day I move out of this prison of HAH, I’m printing up that by-law page about the dog rules and pasting it right on their front door, lovingly signed in dog poop.

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