The Checkbook


I was bullied at work. I remember the moment since it’s been burned in my memory like a cigarette butt in an upholstered couch.

I walked into my bosses office and we started talking about getting gas. No – not the type you get personally, but the gas you use for your car. I explained to her that on that particular day while I went inside to pay for my gas…

I was interrupted.

She said, “You went inside to pay for your gas?”

“Well, yeah.”

“Why didn’t you just use your debit card?”

“Maybe because I don’t have a debit card.”

The look on her face was disbelief and hysteria. She started laughing and said, “Well, how do you pay for your groceries?”

“I write out a check.”

checkbookI took out my checkbook which was the size of a big, red brick. It was also just as heavy. I could have probably caused a massive brain hemorrhage if I had thrown that checkbook at someone’s head.

As my boss examined my ginormous checkbook, three more people joined into her cube to bully me. Apparently, I had fallen behind the times and wasn’t using a debit card like everyone else. Who knew?

I quickly learned my lesson that day and got on the bandwagon to own a debit card and ditched my checkbook, which is now gathering dust and only occasionally used for Christmas, birthdays and Girl Scout Cookies.

Fast forward to today. Let’s compare this scenario to people who used to smoke and are now non-smokers. Most of these people can’t stand to be the presence of people who smoke because the smell makes them sick to their stomachs. It’s kind of the same way with people who use checkbooks and don’t use their debit cards. The perfect example is at the grocery store. It never ceases to amaze me that I always, ALWAYS get in line behind a person who insists on writing out a check.

As we all know, this takes twice as long as using a debit card and it now irritates the living shit out of me. I now troll the cashiers before I actually get into a line because I want to see if the person in front of me has their checkbook out. If they do, I steer clear, baby. I’m not one to dance around issues, so I’ll just come right out and say it: Most of the culprits who still write checkbooks are older. These are probably the same people who don’t use a computer or know what the internet is. These are also probably the same people who call their family members when they can’t figure out the remote to their cable.

Now, don’t get me wrong – I know how to use the internet (I’m writing this blog, aren’t I?), and I just press all the buttons on my remote until something comes up on the TV screen if it’s not working. When that fails, I call my husband who then reminds me I’m acting like his mom who writes checks and calls him when her cable isn’t working.

I’ve broken the habit of writing checks for a living. I really wish the bank system would abolish the whole check writing thing and just make it a law to use a debit card instead. I mean, they’ve made it a law for all of us to have healthcare, so I think they would be helping the health care industry out by speeding up the payment process. Who wants to wait five days for a check to clear? Five days is like five years given the technology we have. I can go to my local grocery store, pay by debit card, come home and go online to see that the funds have already been removed from my account. Businesses would probably be happier getting their money quicker, don’t you think?

So, I can’t be bullied any longer because I own a debit card and use it for everything. My boss was proud of me for making the change, but I had to prove to her my checkbook wasn’t in my purse. My wallet was at the ready with about 20 different cards in it (that’s a whole other story), but the checks were gone. They were banished from my purse like used up Chap Stick.

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3 thoughts on “The Checkbook

  1. Yep, I posted something last week about a lady who ‘held up’ a whole line of people to write 2 checks…one for her purchase and one ro pay her bill. 😦

      1. Then they stand there and enter it into their check log….really! They need to walk away and do it on their ‘own’ time.

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